Parenting and Family Education

Posts Tagged ‘Positive’

Raising children as a single mother is a challenge. There are moments when you find that your life is in complete disarray and your house is in complete chaos. This is the time when you feel that you lack essential parenting tips as a single mother. It is better to have such arsenal at your disposal before you land in such a situation.

There are numerous ways to deal with various age groups. Confronting strategies for toddlers differ with those for teenagers. Your 16 year old boy is likely to make fun of you if he is told to spend some time in a thinking chair as he is being obstinate, stubborn and aggressive. On the other hand a few minutes time out will do wonders while tackling a 4 year old. So to be successful as a single mother you should have a set of parenting tips for each group.

Material regarding good parenting skills is widely available. A number of genuine and self proclaimed specialists are also around. A list of websites, books and other means in this aspect would probably require paragraphs. To make your life easy I would mention a few here. You can start with a library or a book shop. Single moms bringing up toddlers and smaller children will really benefit from the Parents Magazine. Unfortunately the major content in Parents Magazine is aimed at married parents. Among the various books available, you should go through at least a couple of them. Those who like Dr. Fan will recommend you his books. Dr. Terry Brazelton is an authority on child behavior. He is a father as well as a pediatrician. Even though a number of his books may be out of date, the attitude of babies and other children has remained the same since long. Last of all “The Well Trained Mind” is a good choice for those who want to train their children early.

A number of websites and organizations are available to assist single mothers with parenting tips. A renowned group is Parents without partners. They provide a wide range of information for single mothers. In the UK similar information is available on gingerbread. Early Start and Head Start Programs deliver the same services in the USA. You may not be eligible for their preschool assistance, but you can participate in courses and seminars which they conduct on positive parenting. Last of all you can look for topics like single parenting and single mothers through any search engine on the internet and get the required information. So if you are a single mother in search of parenting tips now you know where and how to get the required information.

If you require some parenting tips just now I can give you a few basics. As an adult you should be in control. Keep yourself composed all the time. This may not be easy, particularly when you find green finger paint all over your kitchen. The moment you become angry and irritable, you lose your composure. Such a situation may make your little child scared. To be successful always be composed and exercise control over your voice and actions.

As parenting continues to evolve, new methods of positive parenting are always being developed. Every generation that ages begins to apply new ideas. Currently there are new methods to help parents in raising children. Positive parenting is a way to correct kids without making the children feel down or stupid. One technique is to show a child the right way to do something and reinforcing that positive feeling. The child may fail at a task but the parent is reassuring and lets the kid try it again until they get it right.

Positive parenting works for many kids but there are some parents and kids that may not be able to accomplish this task. That doesn’t mean that the parent or child is failing. Remember, positive parenting will not work all the time. A parent can work at finding positive markers for their children. Look for things that a child responds to, then use that reinforcement in other areas of his life. What the parent is trying to do is to make a child better prepared for the real world that they will someday live in. Starting early in life can make this type of parenting ingrained in the child.

Competition in the Adult World

As ones children get older and they want to spread their wings and fly into the adult world, they can only take with them those things that the parents taught them. The marketplace of America can be tough on those not prepared. If a parent concentrated on only positive parenting, the child will be very disappointed. Not everybody wins in the real world; in fact, most of the time will be filled with disappointment. The difference is how the child reacts to negatives. Learning to cope with loss or negatives is what being successful is all about. Mistakes can change strategy into a winning plan.

If America’s top 100 successful people were polled, every single person would tell of more failures in their early adulthood. They might also say that the failures were what eventually made them successful adults. Positive parenting is a great tool for raising kids, but allow them to make mistakes with small consequences to learn that every action they do has a consequence. Sometimes the consequence is good and sometimes the consequence is less favorable. Teaching the child this will show them that life goes on even when they make mistakes or fail. Changing ones behavior is what makes them excel in the future.

Millions of children with ADHD grow up to be well balanced responsible adults. That is probably due to a number of factors, the home environment, school and above all parents who know and apply a few basic parenting techniques. The ADHD child will always respond to positive parenting. For those who do not have the love and affectionate support at home are at risk of running into trouble with the law and carrying ADHD into adulthood. That can lead to career and relationship ruin.

How can you make your home a place where positive parenting is the norm and not the exception Here are a few tips which can help the ADHD child.

Make sure your child knows the limits. Explain what is required and give examples of stepping over the limits. You have a system of rewards in place and these are dispensed for good behaviour and the child is rewarded promptly. These can range from new toys, treats, outings, computer time. By the way, paediatricians are now telling us that media time should be no more than two hours a day. Having a points or star system is also a good idea and you can develop that into a response cost program where the child loses what he earns through bad behaviour.

Consequences should also be explained and you can even make a list and what happens when these are not followed. Using time-out is favoured by many parents although it is probably better to stay with the child rather than send him to another room.

Explaining things like routine and schedules are another way to positive parenting. Routine and times for various activities are well established . When a change in routine is in the offing, it needs to be explained to the child as sudden changes can be a bit disorientating.

But what happens when your pre teen ADHD child starts arguing and turns into an impossible child? Defiant kids can be a real handful and when they start to pick fights with parents and attack their siblings, then you may need to look at ADHD behavioral therapy which is basically a set of techniques to follow when all else has failed. This is positive parenting at its best because you are regaining control over your children.